A special someone whom I wish was here today
This post is dedicated to my dearest father, who has been away since 2006.
I have not let go, and I still misses you a lot.
Everything in life changes from the day you’re gone.
Previous things that doesn’t matter to me, appears to be important.
Bad habits that I used to have, I’m eager to correct them.
People whom I neglected, I changed for them.
Details of events involve you seem so vivid and I remembered them all, especially during the period when you’re sick, the days that I made you mad, the days that we argued, the days that I lied, those days that when we’re out for Sunday dinners, the very minute you gave me your car keys when I first passed my license, the days that you drove me to school, days that you sat around in the dining area, days that you sat for hours in the hospital bed because you have difficulty breathing.
I’m not sure what to do with these thoughts; it makes me really sad and regrettable.
I still keep the things that you bought for me, everything has its special meaning to me, the bicycle that I demanded and you gave in, the wedding suit you wore when you married mum, the study table that we first bought from Ikea, the pillow that you last held, the shirt that you wore and the precious watch that you dearly owned.
Some actions I really wish I could do otherwise, these thoughts make me really sad.
I remembered vividly during the last time you’re going to be admitted to the hospital, you requested me to send you there but I didn’t, I was naïve and thought of you leaving has never come across my mind.
Reality only set in days and months when you’ve passed.
I wish I could be a better son to you, and remember more good times that we could have spent together.
I always pray that you’re well taken care of and be free of worries now and be really at ease.
Thank you dad, you have helped me grow and I appreciate everything you have given me.
And don’t worry about mum; I will take care of her and will fulfill my duties well as a son.
I still miss you, and will always do.
之政
